R.O.P.D.R.P.W. Episode VIII: Use Wii-sponsibly

Notice how the Wii-mote has not left my hand, because the strap is securely fastened to my wrist.
(Note: No Nintendo Wiis, Kick-ass HD TVs or cats were harmed in the making of this poorly-drawn paint webcomic.)

QUOTE!

I should be writing a paper right now, but here's a gem of a quote, if I do say so myself .


"...of COURSE it is possible to be single and happy. I feel like oftentimes people want to be in a relationship just so they can be in a relationship. Which is maybe not the best reason to be in a relationship! I mean, there are better reasons. Like makin' out. Makin' out is pretty fun."
-Jeph Jacques

Happy Finals Week, Errrrbody.

Studying tonight has put me in a Wagner sort of mood...why? Beats me, but it's been a while since I had any time with Richard (Wagner that is) so, I popped in disk 2 of my Overtures & Preludes album (the better disk; it's got the Ring cycle stuff on it) and sat back to enjoy.

Well, I don't know how I did it, but somehow I managed to forget that the second track on that CD, the Prelude to Act 1 from Parsifal is the prettiest song EVER. Every time I hear it, I want to frolick with puppies, or fall asleep in a meadow, or maybe even fall asleep in a meadow full of frolicking puppies. Anywhom, if you care for orchestral music at all, you should give it a listen sometime. It's 12 minutes of delicious romantic period goodness.
















You know, now that I think of it, I listened to this CD a lot freshman year. In a lot of ways, I was a better student back then. Then again, that's largely due to the fact that I was blissfully unemployed at the time. C'est la vie.

Rooster Teeth and Dallas Clark

Edit: It seems Rooster Teeth has pulled all of the material related to this whole thing. I don't know why they did, but I managed to track it all down, except the video...If I ever find it again, I'll put it up.

First watch this. (Assuming you haven't seen it)

That commercial was actually made by Rooster Teeth Productions, the guys behind the popular web series Red vs. Blue. Apparently, Dallas Clark wasn't happy about it, and whined in the news...something about how he looked like he was dying...whatever.

Anywhom, RT released a response in the form of a news item on their website, which was taken down for some reason. Here's the text:

Dear Mr. Clark,

First, let us begin by saying you are an incredibly strong and handsome man. When we created the "Biggest Hit Ever" Madden '07 commercial featuring your virtual likeness, it was never our intention to portray you as anything but heroic and god-like. Unfortunately, filmmaking - even commercial filmmaking - is an often tumultuous and unpredictable process. Sometimes the best scenes are left wasted on the cutting room floor. Anyone who's seen the director's cut of "Blade Runner" or "Police Academy 5: Assignment Miami Beach" knows exactly what I'm talking about. But I digress.

It's been reported in the media that you felt our little commercial made you "look like a punk" or "like you were dying." However, nothing could be further from the truth. Dallas Clark is not only the single greatest professional athlete of our time, he is also an American Hero. As proof, and as our way of saying sorry, we now present the Director's Cut version of your Madden '07 commercial. We think it also definitively proves your greatness in the virtual world.

In closing, you are a huge and powerful football god whom we do not wish to anger. We are tiny pathetic video game nerds. Please don't hurt us.

Sincerely,
Your adoring fans at Rooster Teeth

The best part about the post, though, was the accompanying video...they took that down too...tear. HILARIOUS. Go RvB! Go electronic ubiquitous Dallas Clark!

DALLAS CLARK IS AWESOME!

Quite So!

Snowy nights...I absolutely love the crap out of them.

I love the way the streetlights reflect off of the freshly frozen roads.

I love the crispness of the air.

I love that I can finally bust out my amazing winter coat.

I love the way I feel justified in sitting around in pajama pants all evening.

I love the way tea always tastes better when it's brutally cold outside.

Of course, this is Oklahoma snow (read: a solid sheet of ice), so it'll either be gone by morning, or suck for snowy day kinds of things, but still, until I move to a cooler climate, I'll enjoy what I've got. Stay warm, kids.

Something

Yeah, it's about time I post something, but for the life of me, there's nothing my brain can muster right now that would be worth reading...


























...as you have just witnessed. But, as a consolation prize, here's a picture of a giant inflatable avocado in shades with a goofy grin on his face. Hope that brightened your day a little.

So....

I listed this site on facebook...you know, in case anyone's interested, amused, or appalled by that. Throw chocolate chip cookies or rotting vegetables as appropriate. Until then...

Good Old Fashioned Violence

SWS-F

Read me, if you haven't yet.

See those bananas? They see you...

"Wort wort wort!" means "Salutations, simpleton."

"Repent!" "Never!" click. clack. SHINK! *thud*

"We're much too far for-HURGK!"

Dislexic man has epiphany: Ha-ah!

There's something on your face...SNACKING!

Hull breach in space? That sucks.

We're sinking; I still hope, love.

Give no quarter! (unless they're ladies)

Can you disembowel a gutless coward?

Bob looks sad... out of Enzite.

What shall I do, Lord? Believe.

People tea? I never said 'Soylent'.

More to come, I think...this is lots of fun. They're in the order that I wrote them, while I was making a pie and sort of writing a paper. Oh, and sorry about the ones that suck.

Silly aTm and their weird traditions...

This isn't the funniest one, but at the moment, it's my favorite.










Besides, we had that first down anyway. Holla...or something.

Elections are Three Weeks Away!

As someone in an ongoing effort to become an informed voter, I've found this website to be quite helpful, for those voting in the Sooner State, that is. Give it a look-see.

Don't Worry

Allen Patrick + Jacob Gutierrez = Adrian Peterson



















Right?

Obscene Gestures to You, Frustrating Setbacks

Today, unfortunately, was somewhat frustrating. To start it out, the hot water in my apartment building was shut off, so no shower for me. That brought the time since last shower to an uncomfortable total, but press on I did. So, I got ready and went off to school on my trusty bycicle, which decided to break down when I was almost there. The chain managed to slip off the back gears and then get stuck in between the end of the gear itself and a bolt holding the little bracket thing (technical term, donchaknow) on. I didn't wreck or anything...no worries there. I stopped and surveyed the damage, then tried to fix it, but I just couldn't get the bloody thing loose. So, I took my now grease-stained fingers off to class and by some miracle made it on time. Classes went okay, nothing too terribly exciting to report there. Of course, without my bike, I had to walk the 2.5 miles home. I actually managed to make the trip in a mere 25 minutes...very good time for just a walk, but then again, I was hauling about as much ass as I could. This brings me to a paper I've been procrastinating for a couple of weeks. The other night I found that I didn't have the book I needed for it, so I figured I'd get it today, read it quick then scramble to write the paper, as I've done so many times before. So, I get home and square a few things away, then head to Boomer Books, no luck. I proceed east along the line of Norman textbook stores: Ratcliff's, Sooner, University, all yeilding no results. By this time, I need to grab some lunch and head to Pride rehearsal, so I do just that. Fast forward to after Pride, I head straight to Borders, no luck there, then Barnes and Noble, also nothing. At this point, I'm kind of entering panick mode, but I head home, check the library website...they have a copy, but it's checked out, and what's the due date? Tomorrow...nice little slap in the face there. So, on a whim, I go to the Pioneer Library System website, and lo and behold, the Norman Public Library has a copy! I rush down to that building I haven't entered since I started OU, get myself a shiny new library card (find out I still owe a 70 cent late fee on a book I checked out in 2002, what's up with that?) and grab that book. Crisis Averted! Anyway, I still have to do all the work for the paper, and go get my bike from campus and fix it, but all in all, I managed to emerge from today pretty much unscathed and unphased. So there!

A New Era

Many of you already know, but for those who haven't heard, The Clunker is going into retirement. That's right, I finally decided to shell out the dinero to join the current technological age. But enough about me...without further ado, I'm proud to introduce Esperanza, The New Hotness.

She's a quite sexy Toshiba Satellite M115-S3094, a sleek little Charcoal number with all the bells and whistles that one would expect from such a machine. Let's have a little comparison to see how the old and the new stack up, eh?

Looks
The Clunker
"Pirate Armada" is a plus, but skuffed up, broken and worn far outweigh it.
Esperanza
The New Hotness.
Esperanza 1, The Clunker 0

Specs
The Clunker
Intel Pentium III Processor, 524 MHz
128MB RAM
11.2 GB HDD
Windows XP Home Edition

Esperanza
Intel Centrino Processor, 1.67 GHz
512 MB RAM
80 GB HDD
Windows XP Media Center Edition (This one goes to Esperanza for the 360 compatibility features)

Esperanza 5, The Clunker 0

Accessories
The Clunker
DVD-ROM
"Dongle/Nubbin/Button Thingy" pointing device, broken (Even though it's broken, The Clunker scores here on principle)
Broken function keys that were inefficient in the first place...
Crappy laptop speakers
Lynksis external wireless card
Dettached LCD monitor/ old CRT

Esperanza
DVD/CD-RW
Touch Pad (I hate these things)
Play, Pause, ect, volume control
Crappy laptop speakers
Integrated wireless
"TruBrite" sexy LCD screen

Final Count
Esperanza 8, The Clunker 1, Draw 2

Esperanza is the clear winner, and it is certainly my hope for the future that it has a long, successful run.

Who's awesome?

Oh yes, that's right, it's me. Who's FINALLY get a raise again at work? Oh yes, me again.










Brag session over.

R.O.P.D.R.P.W. Episode VII: The Power and the Majesty

Behold! The Power, The Majesty, The Might: Pride pregame squad Saxaphone 4!!! Greatest pregame squad EVARX!1@1!!!

A simple, yet amusing video...

Halo 3 - Circle of Life

The timing on this works so well, it's almost scary. The guy who made this must have had waaaaayy too much time on his hands.

Happy International Talk Like a Pirate Day!

Avast, ye scurvy dogs! It be International Talk Like a Pirate Day! The random holiday started by some guys be the new craze sweeping the nation, and one of me favorites. So, all ye land lubbers, it's not to late to have some grog, plunder a galley, and get a few "Arrrrr!"s in before the day's out! Shiver me timbers, I'll be sailing to the library to work on me paper! Arrrrrrrrr!

Retraction

In Saturday's post I refered to the University of Alabama-Birmingham's football squad as the "Dragons." On this point I was in error; their nickname is the "Blazers," I had mistakenly known them as the dragons because there is a dragon on their helmet, and their mascot looks like a dragon.

100 Post-tastic Blogstravaganza!

That's right, Blarg! is officially 100 today! You know, that's not years, but posts is almost as good, right? Anyway, I've been putting together this little recap, and that's why it's been so long since I've posted anything. As I type this, we're less than four hours from the start of the trouncing of the University of Alabama-Birmingham Dragons. There's nothing quite like the season opener, let me tell ya. Also, on that note, if you're interested in playing fantasy football with MEO and I, shoot me an email or leave a comment, and i'll get you the info.

So, without further ado (adieu?), a short recap of the last 100 posts, rated
arbitrarily on a five star scale!

1.Yep, me too...blogging it up. - an intro, with a little ranting. **

2.My take on Star Wars: Episode III - just that. ***

3.Fun Music Thingy, and The Clunker - My start with Audioscrobbler, and a little commentary on my poor embattled laptop.**

4.A few interesting occurances - One of those "what's up" updates...what's updates...tehe ***

5.Happy Memorial Day, have a croissant. - a commentary on some current events****

6.Hope Amidst Tragedy, or Something Like That - a little reflection on my impromptu visit to the bombing memorial*****

7.As the voice of Alan Kalter echoed in my head... - I get a flat tire in the middle of the interstate ***

8.Short Post - for Sean and Meagan *

9.Useful Things - What I learned from Mr. and Mrs. Smith, and other things***

10.He really is a nice guy... - I weigh in on the religion debate.****

11.Geeze... - for the critics*

12.Leggo my heartstrings, Christopher Nolan - my review of Batman Begins, and a rebuttle***

13.Yikes - joint troubles *

14.Introducing... - Heralding the beginning of Richard's Occasional and Poorly Drawn Random Paint webcomic ***

15.Episode I: It makes no sense if you think about it. - the first comic *****

16.OMG! My Hip Just Popped Again! - I am hijacked, and nobody catches it. (Seriously, when do I use 'OMG'?) ***

17. Irksome - a little first person action of the spill that caused me all that hip trouble. ***

18. Attention! - A mini-rant over the incompetence of my customers. ***

19. Blarg. Ducks never listen. - What's up with Blarg!, and trying to swim with a duck. **

20. Vital Information for Your Everyday Life - Summer reading update **

21. Episode II: Pimp My Stanza - There's a reason nobody tricks out japanese family sadans.*****

22. In Memoriam - I remember a fallen comrade (so to speak) *****

23. That's more "now" than usual. - Ahora la Chinga Mismo! *

24. The Most Useful List Ever - A bizarre set of regulations dealing with beds **

25. The Strangest Dining Experience Ever, or Look, I'm Rodknee, Two Posts a Day - Goodbye, Kendall's. ****

26. Strange but true... - Sean and I have fun with wikipedea ***

27. Not Quite a Suicide Squeeze - A little reading update, and a rant about an unruly customer.***

28. "Would you let him skateboard?" - A passage from Angels and Demons that I enjoyed. ***

29. What's a pirate's favorite website? - get your own pirate name **

30. Trip Blog, Concise - I finally get around to that update about the LA trip. ****

31. Size Does Matter - Trouble with my breakfast ***

32. Has anyone ever told you that you've got Yugoslavian hands? - "Weird Al" Yankovic is a talented writer. **

33. Amerime - I wonder about animation culture in Japan compared to the U.S. Most people miss the point of my questions, then The Boondocks comes out a month later and answers the big one. ****

34. Fear the Silent Venezuelan Killers - I have a few suggestions on what Presidente Hugo Chavez can do about Rev. Pat Robertson. *****

35. R.O.P.D.R.P.W. Episode III: Meteor Showered - This comic is about our failed attempt to watch a meteor shower. ***

36. Daring to be the Same - I reflect on my current and past individualism...it's kinda profound, really. *****

37. Tryin' to be all 1337 - OMG! 1tz teh 100 j33rz w4Rxorz! *****

38. A little amusement and sound advice from the past... - The standing orders of Rogers' Rangers ***

39. All Mixed Up - My review of the 311 concert at OU. ***

40. New York Pizza and Pasta! - They finally reopened! **

41. Ratchet Ass - Some lyrics from my favorite rap song **

42. Cookies, Anyone? - A reference that nobody got **

43. Wade Boggs - Smarmy Cheater or Mustachioed Genius? *

44. The Nose of Oklahoma Smells You - a quick recap of Texas weekend **

45. The Way I See It #22 - A quote from a Starbucks cup...interesting ***

46. Casting Lots For Tots - The Oklahoma Education Lottery, why it's bad, and why the kiddees are not a good excuse. *****

47. My Ears Still Ring - The Baylor game was NUTS! **

48. I prefer ham that does not come in brick form that I have to refrigerate - word verification turn on *

49. A Random xanga-esque Post For Once - late nights *

50. I know nobody cares... - a quote from writer Gregg Easterbrooke about things that "happen for a reason" ****

51. Excuses for Inebriation - a post about drinking games, complete with puns *****

52. R.O.P.D.R.P.W. Episode IV: Darth IHOP - an inside joke, but the art is some of my favorite ****

53. You'd Better Watch Out... - Undead Stick Ninjas of the Night, oh yes. *

54. More for Alex and Sean than anybody else... - a passage from a science book reminds me of The Dark Tower **

55. Nobody's Postin'... - Pictures from the Holiday Bowl trip, and also a pie **

56. I hear things... - probably the most random post ever...confused some people ***

57. Bill Wallace? - a request for info on my favorite children's author yields no results **

58. I am a Big Nerd - a post about how i love the first day of school, and how hard my semester would be ***

59. Oh Yeah, Sometimes I Go to Work Too - general update about a few things **

60. Just 'Cause - a lymerick about writing a lymerick **

61. R.O.P.D.R.P.W. Episode V: Final Answer - Basically, I slam dunk Dr. Savage's head...with hell of disclaimers, of course ****

62. Hewie Lewis Needs Time to Create - funny news items I had missed *****

63. All-Nighter Post! - I stayed up all night, and wrote about it ***

64. All-Nighter Post, Part Deux - an update on the day after, plus plans for later **

65. Is it 'cause they like my gangster ways? - yep. I'm pretty sure this one was influenced by a sleepless night of paper-writing. *

66. All-nighter Post, With a Vengence - This was quite a week **

67. So... - I finally finished the papers *

68. "Go back to the killing..." - a thought about sad moments in "We Were Soldiers" ***

69. Johari Window - fun on the internet *

70. New Idea for Wednesdays - the first and last Wednesdaily Emo-ish Lyrics Post **

71. So, I stayed up all night again... - a lymerick and three haiku ***

72. Silly Rabbit, Trix are for Selfish Racists - Cereal ads are spreading oppression *****

73. Cringe - an update for uptodatedness **

74. Crazy Katherine's Crazy Blog Survey Thing...Crazy - stuff **

75. In the Time-honored Tradition... - question is, which tradition? Check the date if you're having trouble. *****

76. I'm behind! - a contest that NOBODY entered...you guys suck! I love you anyway though. *

77. This is a story... - about a young hermit crab named Jean Valjean ****

78. A Few Questions: Some Asked, Some Answered - more fun with current events! ***

79. The iPod Really is errrrwhere! - I love that picture. **

80. Meagan is the greatest... - ...she took me to Popeye's. *

81. You Lazy Bums - And the winner is: ME! ****

82. I try to keep this a largely drama-free space... - ah, the old cunundrum **

83. Seriously, I laughed for like five minutes. - Nintendo makes an interesting decision. **

84. In Reply - a little political hem and haw ****

85. Gregg Easterbrook back at ESPN - a little news on a favorite columnist **

86. Smooth and Intruiging! - I miss Vanilla Coke *

87. The Hardest Semester of My Life and The Great Apartment Hunt - call it a sigh of relief **

88. I just thought everybody should know... - Jalapeño Pringles! **

89. I always knew Frasier was a stupendous badass! - Dr. Crane's looking blue...he he he he! *

90. New Beginnings - an outlook on moving ***

91. Yo ho ho! - Wireless Pirate! *

92. R.O.P.D.R.W. Episode VI: Now I'm Annoying Too - My customers cannot read.*****

93. Random Overview Updatetacular! - getting everybody caught up after my long absence **

94. I finally deciphered the mystery... - Obscure Rock and Roll genres 101 *****

95. Hokai, so... - The Clunker breaks; I take it apart. ***

96. The Saga of The Clunker: Update - The Clunker becomes an improvised desktop***

97. Yay! - I'm excited about Breaking Benjamin's Phobia. *

98. Just in case you were wondering... Thanks to some car trouble and work trouble, I don't have a very good day. **

99. Summer Over - I didn't read very much *

100. 100 Post-tastic Blogstravaganza! - You're reading it! ******

Oh yeah, and e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail e-mail!

Summer Over

Books read: 2....what the hell, man? What did I do for three months?

Just in case you were wondering...

...nine hours working alone at a coffee bar (including opening, and the morning rush) with naught but a five minute break is not fun, not for the customers, and certainly not for me. No-sirreeeee....the people incessantly fucking with the schedules at Albertson's to save a few dimes here and there do not make me happy. Why is it that so many big companies have middle managements rife with morons, yet so many seem to stay afloat? They are on my list. What list? I don't know, the unhappy list, or something.


Oh, and also, my clutch. It's on that list too, what with its whole 'not-clutching-anymore' thing.

Yay!

New Breaking Benjamin album comes out tomorrow. I dare say I'm excited about that. So, yeah.


Completely worthless update over!

The Saga of The Clunker: Update

Well, the life of The Clunker has taken a new turn, as it is now sitting on my desk hooked up to a monitor. I only had to expose a few guts to do it, too...he he he. Hopefully I'm not exposing myself to an electric shock risk, but a guy can only prop his monitor up on the arm of the couch for so long before he starts to go crazy, you know?















I don't think it looks half bad, all things considered. (That's a lot of things, you know?)

Hokai, so...

The Clunker's been through another rough spot. Nothing crashed, but there was a fair bit of breakage. That's right, my computer was physically broken. The hinge on the right side of the monitor locked up, then started tearing into the case, making stuff break.



So, we took the crazy thing apart to get the hinge out and try to unstick it. My computer spent the last week or two in pieces of my kitchen table.


Soooooo, long story short, we couldn't get it the damned hinge unstuck, so I put it back together, just without the hinge. Unfortunately, the monitor can't stand up anymore, and the case is still all broken apart; fortunately, all the insides seem to be functioning normally. My computer's more broken than ever, but at least it's still functional.

I finally deciphered the mystery...

...of obscurly named rock and roll sub-genres. Yep, it's a little like that whole fountain of youth/ golden cities of cibola thing those 15th century guys in the ships were after, except a little more 21st century suburbanite.

The first thing you need to remember is that it's all as subjective as hell. That's right: conventional rules, goodbye! Adios, Ingles! Puedes usar mas o menos qualquier nombre que deseas. Oh, lo siento... anyway, the name itself isn't all that important. The most important thing to remember when naming obscure rock and roll subgenres is to speak with authority. You must project confidence. Nay, what's more, you must go beyond confident, straight to aloof and superior. If you act like you're better than everyone, people who don't know about your obscure rock and roll subgenre (which is just about everybody) will assume you're better educated, more knowledgeable, privy to some trivia they're just unaware of. Now, we'll go step by step in obscure subgenre classification.

Step One: Select a broad, accepted rock and roll subgenre. Some of these include alternative (quite vague), punk (think angry kids with ugly hair), pop (if it's not punk, and middle school girls like it, it probably goes here), and soft rock (let's get mellow and sappy!), but you're by no means limited to these. For our purposes, we'll take the ever-present sub-genre punk.

Step Two: Here, we get a little more creative. We need to narrow our sub-genre down a little. This is best done with either a time period or a cultural movement, or very often both, for instance, grunge, 80's, emo, disco, or something of the like. I find this most effective when using the prefixes pre- and post-. It sounds better if we say when it wasn't, not when it was. For our example, let's go for pre-emo. Okay, so far, we have Pre-emo punk.

Step Three: This is where we conclude our absurd exercise, and have the most fun. Be warned, though, this is the part that makes the least sense. Take pretty much any noun, verb, or adjective, and add the suffix -core. For instance, cheesecore, jumpcore, sneezycore, or hey, suffixcore. Let's use something simple though, something like sheepcore. Here we go:

Pre-emo Sheepcore Punk

There we have it; we've created our own obscure rock and roll subgenre. What does it sound like? I don't know! But neither does anyone else, and that's the main thing. Go forth my young friends, and use your powers for good, not evil.

Random Overview Updatetacular!

So, here I am, back home and on the internet, blogging because I suck at rolling dice. It's been a pretty busy 5 weeks since I moved in here, what with getting stuff situated in the new apartment (an ongoing project, maybe I'll be all moved in before I move out), going to work all the freakin' time (still part time though), and tagging along on the Oelke vacation to the Dairy/Badger State.

As far as the apartment goes, I've got all the furniture in, the living room set up, stuff on the walls in everything except the bathroom and bedroom. I still need to get more dishes, pots and pans, get my bedroom all nice and moved in looking, and I also want to get some houseplants...we'll see if I can keep them alive. I've got to get all my decoration all set, but I've got a lot on the walls, so that's a plus.

I've been somewhat gaga for the world cup, despite the fact that the US team sucked it up big time again. Why is it that every time the tournament's in Europe, we can't get out of the first round? Oh well, Brazil's not going to win again, so I'm happy about that.

I've started working mornings lately...the getting up early sucks, but the being done by 1 is pretty sweet.

Though all my fish survived the move, which was a great surprise, I recently lost my plecostomus, Benjamin Disraeli III. My Gourami doesn't look well, and I thought he was going to bite it when we were out of town, but strangely he persists. Maybe he'll actually get well. That would be pretty crazy.

The trip was pretty good, there were some ups and downs, but the last half of the trip was considerably more enjoyable than the first. Lots of fireworks and food, and I got to see a lot of Wisconsin. It's really pretty up there, very much not Oklahoma. On the way out, we saw Flogging Molly play in Milwaukee. They are FABULOUS. If you like their studio music, you would not be disappointed by their live performance. Yeah, they pretty much just kick ass. The trip back kicked ass too, in the sense that it kicked our asses...yikes. We left Milwaukee around midnight on the 5th. I drove until four that morning, and Meagan slept, then we switched. We stopped and slept for a couple of hours near Springfield, Illinois, then continued. Pretty much all of I-44 in Missouri and Oklahoma was under construction and down to one lane each way every 20 miles or so. Probably the highlight of the trip back was when we ate lunch at Panera Bread in Rolla, Missouri, and had a short conversation with the band director of the university there, who apparently was a history major at one point. Score! Anyway, the whole experience was very tiring, and when you add midnight Pirates and work at 7, it's very very tiring. I'm still tired...woo hoo!

Also, Cheese curds, freakin' great, but they don't exist here...freakin' sucks.

R.O.P.D.R.P.W. Episode VI: Now I'm Annoying Too

Yeah, It's been a really long time. Too long. I've wanted to do one about my less-perceptive customers for a while, and I'm glad I finally got around to it. So enjoy! Oh yeah, and an alternate title was "In what language does 'Closed' mean 'Morons please come talk to me?'".

Yo ho ho!

I be pirating me neighbor's wireless for this post! Arrrrrrrr!!

New Beginnings

Well, it's my last night in Bishop's Landing, and that means I won't have the internet for a to-be-determined amount of time, so I figured I ought to record a post.

Moving is always an interesting experience. Going through your stuff you get to see a small representation of your existance over the period of time that you lived there. Of course there's the lifting and cleaning and whatnot, but that comes tomorrow. Some people look at moving as an end, but I prefer to look at it as a beginning. So, as I leave here, I'm looking forward to the beginning of a new era in my life, and I hope it's as pleasant for all involved as it will be for me.

I always knew Frasier was a stupendous badass!

I just thought everybody should know...

...I love Jalapeño Pringles.




Yes, I love them, like a noche bonita en una cantina con amigos;
como los sueños, los besos, y la musica.







Which is to say, quite a lot.

The Hardest Semester of My Life and The Great Apartment Hunt

Well, folks, the hardest semester of my life has finally come to a close. I'm kinda curious about those grades, but barring any huge surprises, they should be alright. I'm more just happy to have that out of the way. Time for some enjoying myself...sleeping in, outdoor activities, reading for pleasure, late night halo sessions, going to work all the time. Oh, well, four out of five ain't bad. While the semester was pretty hard, it wasn't that bad, and I learned a lot. I got through it anyway, so I'm just looking forward to the upcoming summer.

In other news, it appears that the great apartment hunt has also come to an end. This morning I put down a deposit for a one-bedroom at Aspen Village Apartments, to which I have referred at any given time as Ashton Village, Aspen Grove, Ashton Villas, and a number of other exciting combinations. I'm a little paranoid, because the complex is somewhat old, but I have no reason not to be optimistic.

Smooth and Intruiging!

Yeah, internet petitions never work, but it comforts me to know somebody else cares.

Gregg Easterbrook back at ESPN

Although I'm sure none of you who read this care, once-embattled writer Gregg Easterbrook, who writes my favorite internet column, Tuesday Morning Quarterback, has been re-hired by ESPN, who fired him in 2003 for saying Jews are good with money, or something like that. He spent two seasons writing at nfl.com, but ESPN has apparently gotten over it, and lured him back. This is good, because NFL wouldn't let him be as critical of them as he had been, but bad, because I prefer the tasteful white and blue color scheme of nfl.com to the harsh yellow and red of ESPN's page2.

Anyway, if you're interested, you can find his current (and pre-fallout, it seems) stuff here, his nfl.com stuff here, and a nice summary of the whole situation here (you don't have to subscribe; click the arrow and through the ad).

In Reply

Sean posed a good question on his blog. This is an attempt to answer it.

So, how can we, a society of garbagemen, investment bankers, extreme sports enthusiasts, kickboxers, short-order cooks, tech support phone operators, and Wal-mart greeters be qualified to choose our leaders? Well, I agree with you that we can't. While the presidency could be seen as an extention of running a small business, and maybe, at its core, it is, the American political game has made the situation much more complicated. What's more, is that most of our founding fathers agree with you. True democracy on the national level died in Athens. The closest example in our history is the New England town meeting, which was never applied on more than a local level. Democracy is probably the most inefficient form of government. Remember that constitution thing you probably heard about once or twice in highschool? It was never the intention for populace to elect the president. The president would be elected by the Electoral College, whose members would be appointed by state legislatures, who were elected by the people. The elites of the early years of our nation saw the most notable citizens of communities who comprised state legislatures appointing some of their finest to elect the president. The oft unruly House of Representatives was the haven of the people, and they had to share their power with the Senate. All this considered, I'm not saying that we shouldn't elect our leaders. In fact, I maintain that it is essential that we elect our leaders.

The political elites of a nation must be held accountable for their actions by someone other than their peers. Ideally, and usually in the case of the U.S., that's us, the public at large, the librarians, doughnut bakers, and stockbrokers. If the elites are the only ones with the power to keep tabs on the elites, then the little guy suffers, if not with the current leaders, then sometime down the road. Through this important check, somehow we've been able to maintain a government that's been more or less of the people, by the people, and for the people for 230 years. It is not a question of qualification, it is a question of the necessity of maintaining our most basic national ideals.

Seriously, I laughed for like five minutes.

Too bad it isn't supposed to be funny.

I try to keep this a largely drama-free space...

...but occasionally, even I get a little moody.

I don't know if all those X chromosomes running around make telepathy easier, or that the Y chromosome inhibits it, but I'm quite sure of one thing: I utterly lack the ability to understand females.

Okay, so not all that dramatic. In other, entirely unrelated news, it's time for a new comic, but I have no ideas right now. Oh well, we'll see.

You Lazy Bums

Seeing as how no entries were submitted for my little contest, I'm doing the only logical thing I can: declaring myself the winner.

I've determined a really great prize for the winner too: the afformentioned cookie and undying praise and affection, as well as a 1992 Nissan Stanza...that's right, lucky winner, you just won a car!

Here now is an interview with the victorious contestant:

Mr. Greene (and his orchestra): How do you feel to have won such fabulous prizes?

Victorious Contestant: Well, frankly, I feel fabulous, and I'd like to thank everyone who made this possible...God, me, Family Guy, the guy who built the shower, all the people who didn't respond. Yeah, I think that's pretty much it.

Mr. G: Your friends on the internet sure blew this one, didn't they?

VC: Wow, they sure did, didn't they?

Mr. G: Of course! Say, that cookie looks delicious, mind if I have a bite?

VC: Why, not at all! You strike me as a fine fellow.

Mr. G: What are you going to do now that you've won this contest? Go to Disney World? Go to bed? Buy the Cleveland Caveliers?

VC: I think that I'm going to take a spin in my fabulous prize car, or make a sarcastic post on my blog.

Mr. G: Sounds like a high quality time, either way. Thank you so much for your time. You are clearly an outstanding individual.

VC: You're quite welcome, I'd come back any time.

Meagan is the greatest...

...she took me to Popeye's. It was very tasty.

The iPod Really is errrrwhere!

I'm not too strongly concerned with the cause, but this amused me too much not to mention. (I know most of you probably already saw this on Rodney's blog, so sorry if that bothers you)

A Few Questions: Some Asked, Some Answered

This week, the big question on every OU basketball fan's mind was answered:

That's right, Kellen Sampson, son of former coach Kelvin Sampson, will not being following Daddy to Indiana; he will stay on and play (or, you know, sit on the bench) for the Sooners. Oh yeah, and they hired some Capel guy.



Sometime in the last four days, Front Street has become James Garner Avenue. First of all, WTF mate? Second of all, why not Jimmy Bumgarner Avenue? Finally, now that it's gone, will we ever know why the hell it was called Front Street in the first place?

This is a story...

...a story about a young hermit crab named Jean Valjean.

Jean Valjean led a peaceful life in his friendly oceanside dwelling. He had a lovely split-level conch shell about 20 feet from el mar, and he liked to take daily walks down the beach, partially for exercise, but mainly to survey his mighty domain (all hail).

This is not to say the beach was not without its perilous perils...its perils could be quite perilous. But Jean Valjean was somewhat above all this nonsense; after all, he had his trusty shell. So, with fear of neither man nor beast, he embarked on his morning constitutional.

This morning, however was not like most other mornings for our crustacean friend. He peaked out on the world for the first time that day and saw not only the usual bright shining sun, oh no. Obscuring it was a large, red-striped disk high up in the sky. Not quite so high as those damned seagulls, what with their squawking and posturing (they could be a nuisance, but brandish a claw hither or thither, they got the message right quick, let me tell you), but still high enough as to have originated from some unusually powerful creature.

Naturally, the intrepid crab was eager to investigate this newfound obstruction, but not so eager as to just charge out and anger it, like so many daffy English k-niggits. He decided to go ask the opinion of his nextdoor neighbor, wise old Qinxiuhuangdi, the turtle that lived in a large, yet run down terra-cotta number a few rocks over. When our hero asked the old codger what he made of the grand Thing in the Sky, he put down his breakfast of seaweed, stroked his long beard, and let out a thoughtful "Hmmm..."

"...I've seen something like this before," he finished, 30 minutes later. "Either it's an imported variety of tree, or it's space aliens."

"Space aliens?" Jean asked. "Don't they come from Mexico?"

"What's Mexico?" Qinxiuhuangdi queried.

"I don't know, I read it on a wordy leaf that landed on my doorstep one morning."

"Oh, okay, well, no. Space aliens come from far away worlds, farther even than the sandbar, or the treeline...most likely, that's what this is."

"Good enough for me," our vigilant arthropod submitted. He turned tail and skittered his cute little split-level shelled butt on over below the space aliens' giant suspended disk. "Space Aliens!" he hollered, "What is your business here? I am the intrepid hermit crab, Jean Valjean. This is my beach, and I welcome you in peace. I mean you no harm, and permit you to walk down my beach!"

Just as he finished his speech, a shadow crept over him. With his last words, he felt himself being lifted high into the air by his home. He saw a pair of enormous green eyes set in a speckled (not to mention hideous) face, and heard a booming voice remark that he had a cute little shelled butt, then before he knew it, he found himself enclosed in a slick prison that was a shade of faded red.

Jean Valjean realized what was happening to him. He was being abducted by aliens.

To be continued...

I'm behind!

But in other news, I had this idea while contemplating Family Guy in the shower the other day...(c'mon, everybody does it).

An Arbitrary Competition: Get Esoteric with Me!

That's right, here's your chance to prove that we share an obscure path of understanding...leave me a comment that's as esoteric (between the two of us) as possible. I don't care how you do it, but at the end, the winner will be the one who best fits the topic without going over (that is, I have to get it for it to be an eligible entry). I'll give it a week or so, then declare a winner. I don't know what you get though...a cookie? My undying praise and affection? Eh, we'll see.

If you're wondering about the word, there's always my old friend Webster, but you should already know that it's neither sexy nor delicious (and what's more, that Who's the Boss is not a food).

In the Time-honored Tradition...

I got totally plastered last night. I was so fucking drunk I couldn't see my feet straight.

I was at this crazy party with some band people, and the bar they had set up was quite extensive. I started out slow: a few sips of this, and taste of that here and there, but pretty soon, I'd discovered my fondness for Jose Cuervo Especial tequila. Needless to say, errrrbody in the club gettin' tipsy. Well, errrbody in my club anyway. After a while, I didn't even mind drinking beer. (Yes, that's right, the nasty, fizzy, fermented barley crap that I hate) I was sipping a bottle of some sort of beer (don't really remember that well) when some frat boy came up and slammed his bottle atop mine. Thankfully, I was previously informed by Matt that at this point, it is a party foul to let the brew spill on the floor. Well, no party foul for me; chug chug chug, and Mr. Beer was dead, long live the next beer I drank. Well, it lived as long as the frat boy stayed away. He did it again, and once again, no foul for me, only this time I turned the beer over, letting the contents get all over ole Mr. Kappa Omega I'mabastard. Needless to say, he was none too happy with me. He tried to clock me upside the head with a bottle-a-bub', but luckily for me, I was trying to take a step at the time. I swerved so bad, his blow merely glanced off of my shoulder, and he went clattering into the wall. Unfortunately for me, I tripped over a coffee table and bashed my head on the floor.

The next thing I remember, I was in somebody's bathroom next to the toilet. I took advantage of my proximity to the facilities, then went out into the living room to find my way home. The guy who had given me a ride was passed out on the couch next to some girl, but there were some people who seemed sobre (I think) in the kitchen. I got one of them to take me home.

The car ride was okay, I'm pretty sure the interior had leather upholstrey, but who knows? I was paying too much attention to the pretty lights whizzing by outside the window. I think I was more or less dragged to the door. Somehow I ended up unlocking the door, and even locking it back again. I made it all the way to the couch, where I woke up this morning wearing a T-shirt that was three sizes too small for me with "Why are you staring at my chest?" written in big, bold letters on the front. I've yet to identify the owner.

Crazy Katherine's Crazy Blog Survey Thing....Crazy

As silly as these things are, I still like them.

Four jobs you have had in your life:
1. Albertson's/Starbucks Coffee Bar worker guy
2. Full-time Student, University of Oklahoma
3. Charleston's Restaurant Busser
4. Occasional Window Cleaner

Four movies you would watch over and over:
1. The Hunt for Red October
2. The Matrix
3. Robin Hood: Men in Tights
4. Raiders of the Lost Ark

Four places you have lived:
1. Norman, OK
2. Castleberry, FL
3. Columbia, SC
4. New Knoxville, OH

Four TV shows you love to watch
1. Frasier
2. Futurama
3. Family Guy
4. The West Wing (though it's been a while)

Four places you have been on vacation
1. Washington, DC
2. San Diego, CA
3. All over the freakin place, FL
4. Colorado Springs, CO

Four Websites I visit daily:
1. Kingdom of Loathing
2. Ctrl-Alt-Del
3. Penny Arcade
4. Wikipedia
(last three are more or less daily)

Four of my favorite foods
1. Lasagna (best when it's one day old)
2. Enchiladas
3. Baby-back ribs
4. Pizza

Four places I would rather be right now:
1. The land where I don't have school for a few weeks
2. Colorado
3. Rome
4. Someplace Beachy

Four friends I am tagging that I think will respond:
1. I don't have the foggiest
2. Lather
3. Rinse
4. Repeat

Cringe

That's right...it's an update for the sake of uptodatedness.

Hello, my name is Richard and I make up words because it's fun.

*Hi, Richard*

So, now that we've got that out of the way...Kingdom of Loathing: I've become addicted. If you're not playing it, you should be. You can laugh at all the puns, smile at the pop culture references, join Meagan's clan, and revel in the browser based goodness.

The March snow happened tonight, right on time in the first week of spring. There are some pretty decent flakes going, but the ground's not going to be cold enough for anything to stick. Looks like it's just going to be cold. "Wear thick socks, Gordon." (C'mon, name the movie)

I've been working on another comic, but it's not ready yet...not that funny either, but oh well.

I'm pleased to report that plecostomus Benjamin Disraeli III is still alive and sucking. Nobody in my tank has died for a few weeks. I think it's officially safe to say I've got this whole fish thing off the ground. All the credit is really due to Meagan though, without her I'd have been lost in the endevour.

Oh yeah, and school's hard, I work way too much, and I don't have enough free time to satisfy my personal needs or those others want of me. So, pretty much business as usual.

Silly Rabbit, Trix are for Selfish Racists

Surely we all remember those commercials for Trix. The kids that they target can't really understand what they are about. Sure, it's all good cereal fun...there's a cartoon rabbit, there are cartoon kids, and they have a playful back and forth that resembles that of the lucky charms leprechaun.

Kids grow up, though, and learn to understand the fact of the matter: that the Trix commercials are not about fruity goodness in every bite, they are about racism. All that poor rabbit wants is a simple bowl of cereal. The stuff looks good after all, and "the man" has been dangling it above his head for years. Those kids munch on that cereal like there's no tomorrow, smiling and laughing all the way. The rabbit asks for a bowl, and all he gets is "Silly black guy, good education is for kids,"...I mean, "Silly Asian, equal pay is for kids,"...er, "Silly woman, voting is for kids,"...wait, that's "Silly Arab, assumed innocence is for kids"...oh, who can remember these things?

All that cute little rabbit wants is to eat a bowl of cereal with the happy cartoon children. Why can't he? By the simple fact that he's a rabbit. Trix are for kids only because they say Trix are for kids. The sooner the rabbit has a bowl of Trix with the kids, the better chance we'll have of achieving the American Dream to which we aspire.

So, I stayed up all night again...

I haven't slept in a long time
I wasn't commiting a crime.
I was writing a paper
not pulling a caper,
and to just say "it sucks" would not rhyme.

I don't want to go
to all my classes today.
I would rather sleep.

You never can tell
when a stumbled-on blessing
will happily last.

Now I get to play
the game of staying awake.
I hope I win it.

New Idea for Wenesdays

It's Wednesday...what do we need?

A Wednesdaily Emo-ish lyrics post, because society hates me, and parents just don't understand, or something....anyway, these songs are in tune with my chi, or some other hippy crap.

Giving Up, by The Darkness

My mamma wants to know
Where I'm spending all my dough
Honey, all she does is nag, nag, nag
But I won't apologise
I'd inject into my eyes
If there was nowhere else to stick my skag

All I want is brown
And I'm going into town
Shooting up as soon as I'm back
My friends have got some good shit
All I want is some of it
Gimme, gimme, gimme that smack

Well I've ruined nearly all of my veins
Sticking that fucking shit into my arms

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Givin' up, givin' up givin' a fuck
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Givin' up, givin' up givin' a fuck

Getting off my face
There's a dragon I must chase
Honey, I'm the scourge of all mankind
And everyone but me
Is destined just to be
Slaves to the remorseless grind

But I found myself an easy way out
Sticking that fucking shit into my arms
Into my arms

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Givin' up, givin' up givin' a fuck
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Givin' up, givin' up givin' a fuck

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Givin' up, givin' up givin' a fuck
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Givin' up, givin' up givin' a fuck
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Givin' up, givin' up givin' a fuck
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Givin' up, givin' up givin' a fuck

Johari Window

So...I got this in an e-mail from Jenni Walker about a week ago, and sent it in an email to a few people, and now i'm putting it on here, so everybody can see how I'm percieved. Go on, percieve me...you know you want to.


EDIT: Fun fact, this was done by the same guy who did Urban Dead.

"Go back to the killing...

...I can't take any more of the death."



We just watched We Were Soldiers, the Vietnam War movie from a few years ago. It was strange; the scenes of men dying in horrible ways on the battlefield didn't bother me very much. The scenes with the wives recieving news of their husbands' death, however, were a bit much for me. Were I a movie cryer, that definitely would have done it.

So...

All the papers are done. I don't want to do that many papers in a row ever again.

All-nighter Post, With a Vengence

Holy crap, I did it again...

To say that my paper is "Not good" would be an accurate statement to a certain extent. More accurate would be an something along the lines of "in desperate need of revision," "somewhat incomplete," or "more bullshit than I can really get away with." So, it's either going to be nap for a little bit, then do a day of class and revise during breaks, or the same thing, with not sleeping. Either way, with class today, writing another paper tonight, class tomorrow, and work tomorrow, I'm going to be pretty much useless come tomorrow night...I sit here and think that it's strange to call Thursday tomorrow, and I don't even want to consider how bad my body clock is going to be screwed then.

Is it 'cause they like my gangster ways?

As a matter of fact, yes. It is because they like my gangster ways. You don't even have to finish the song!

All-Nighter Post, Part Deux

Okay, so here's the scoop.

The day went just fine, I only nodded off once, and that in a lecture class, not something more important. Now I've made the probably foolish decision to stay up until some sort of "going to sleep" kind of time, because if I went to sleep now, I'd just wake up in the middle of the night, and be tired half-way through work tomorrow. Forget about writing my paper for Honors. So, since my schedule will not accomodate me being nocturnal, I will stay up this evening and watch Planet of the Apes (so I can write that paper) and probably have some dinner, because that's a good thing. I just REALLY REALLY hope that neither of these next two papers turn into all-nighters, because I'm really tired right now. So Meagan and I are going to get some frozen custard. Yay, frozen custard!

All-Nighter Post!

Hooray for original titles!

So, I pulled an all-nighter finishing my spanish paper. I don't feel super great, but pretty good, considering I haven't slept for nearly 24 hours. I just watched the US team lose a curling match to Canada. Yeah, I'm pretty much an olympics junkie. If it were more than every two years, I'd probably be in trouble. I'm watching ice dancing right now, for crying out loud! So, sadly this will probably not be the last all-nighter this week, as I've got two more papers left, and I haven't started either of them. Naturally, I think this one is pretty much crap, but I always do that, so we'll wait to see the grade. So, now I get to go out in the 30 degree weather and play the see if I can stay awake for six more hours game. I hope I win. I don't think I'd get a gold medal though.

Hewie Lewis Needs Time to Create

Well, as my begin-the-semester post promised, I've been a busy guy. Though I haven't had to take up residence in the library yet, I have been considerably out of action as far as fun and hanging out go. Another thing I've missed is reading the news. I did a little bit of this lately, and I'm pleased to report that it's just as funny as ever. Who needs The Daily Show? Headlines like this take care of themselves.

Though it's not really funny, the biggest news for me lately has been the beginning of the Olympics. This biannual international athletic spectacle has always been one of my favorite things to watch. The winter ones are so much fun. I mean, who'd have guessed you could make so many sports out of sliding around on ice? Come to think of it, curling is kinda funny...he he he, brooms.

In international news, Muslims are upset (and by upset, I mean rioting in the streets) because a Danish newspaper published a comic depicting the prophet Muhammed as having a turbin that was actually a ticking timebomb. And it's not like there are a few looneys trying to get political in the streets...in nearly every Muslim majority country, people have been gathering in throngs to chant anti-Danish slogans and burn Danish flags, parliaments have passed resolutions comdemning newspapers. In some cases, the rioters have stormed embassies and newspaper offices. Can you imagine if this sort of thing happened in the US? What if the Republicans rioted in the streets every time a cartoonist depicted Bush as a monkey? Or, even more parallel, what if mobs of Christians razed local FOX affiliates every time Family Guy depicted Jesus in an insulting way? None of us would get a moments peace, or American Idle for that matter!

Iraq has recently elected a new prime minister, who happens to be a Shi'ite. The Sunnis say they're being oppressed as retaliation for the oppression of Shi'ites under Saddam Hussein, and the Kurds say that they're not getting enough sovereignty. Meanwhile, a large U.S. military force occupies the country, trying to keep the three factions from being blown to bits while they chomp at eachothers' throats.

Speaking of Saddam Hussein, they made him come back to his trial. He responded by screaming things like "Down with Bush!" and "Long live Iraq!" and calling the judge a criminal. I can't really say I blame him though. Nobody stays in power for 30+ years by being stupid, and anyone with half a brain would know he's totally going down. I guess he figures if he's going out, he might as well do it with a bang.

Speaking of dignified politicians, VP Dick Cheney shot some guy this weekend while they were hunting quail. Nobody died, but tell me, is anyone surprised by this, at all?

In local reports, in a recent interview with Hornets rookie Chris Paul, former NBA star and TNT commentator Charles Barkley recently refered to Oklahoma, and the city specifically, as a "vast wasteland". Maybe that's because HALF THE STATE IS ON FIRE! He also said that it "wasn't a place for" black people. Well, anyway, Paul responded by calling Barkley lazy. This whipped the local media into a frenzy, with every leading personality from the local TV stations and newspapers, and even the Governor to challenge Barkley to come to the city and enjoy a Hornet's game, dinner, et cetera. He'd probably change his mind if he came, but then, that might not be a good idea, as some overly-proud country boy would probably punch him in the face.

So, that's my take on the weekend's news. Feel free to leave me comments, and I will feel free to make fun of, I mean answer them.

R.O.P.D.R.P.W. Episode V: Final Answer

Big-assed Red Disclaimer:
The following episode of Richard's Occasional and Poorly-Drawn Random Paint Webcomic features metaphorical decapitation of a certain OU history professor. I'm not advocating physical violence here. It is not meant to be taken seriously, like, at all. I have a lot of respect for the man, and I still consider murder a horrible thing that shouldn't happen. What you should take seriously is the fact that anyone attempting to exact some sort of physical violence against Dr. Savage would totally get themselves messed up. The man is a complete badass, and probably wouldn't hesitate in any sort of threatening situation. I wouldn't be at all surprised if he kept a vintage colt revolver in pristine working condition and loaded in his desk drawer, and a 12-guage under his bed, with spare shells in the dresser. Consider yourself warned.

















(Once again, this is merely a representation of a surprising grade)

Just 'Cause

I'm writing a lymerick now,
not singing, or milking a cow.
It's here on my blog,
not under a log.
That's just more than I could allow.

Oh Yeah, Sometimes I Go to Work Too

I would just like to announce that I am not yet behind in any of my classes. Yes, this is an achievement. Just ask the people I hardly see anymore.

And, on another note, Firefly is indeed high quality television. I can see why it would get cancelled after only one season though. It seems like the kind of quirky show that while everyone could enjoy it, some people would be too busy complaining about how it was weird to enjoy it.

I realize they're striving for authenticity, but tell me I'm not the only one that finds it strange that the members of Beatles-imitator group 1964 all wear platform shoes to make them appear the height of the Beatle they portray? I mean, sure, on one hand they're more authentic, but on the other, they're less authentic, because I'm sure the real Beatles never wore platform shoes of varying heights to make them look a certain height. Or maybe they did, but I don't think so.

I am a Big Nerd

I love the first day of school! There's just something so refreshing about it...

There's the anticipation of learning new things.

New faces replace the same old ones, and same old ones become refreshing, familiar ones.

You never have to deal with that one professor again...you know the one.

The smell of new books pervades your backpack/room/car/wherever the kids store them these days.

Every class holds the potential for being a defining experience.

So yeah! Sure, the hope of learning comes along with syllibi full of work to be done, and the smell of new books always comes along with a smaller bank balance, but if you look on the bright side, the new semester can be a pleasent beginning for all. That said, this one's gonna be a toughie for sure...

On tuesday I started with Piano for Non-Majors II, which looks like it's going to be just as enjoyable as Piano for Non-Majors I, as long as I can get back into the rhythm of things. I might need to practice though.

After that was History of the Crusades, with Dr. Magnusson, for whom I had Medieval Europe a few semesters ago. The tone and work level seem about the same for this class, so academically, all should go well. This is my biggest class, with about 100 people, and randomly sitting down in one of the few open seats, I managed to sit by two people I already know. There's also one of my favorite people from work in that class, which will mark the first time I've ever had a class with someone from work.

Later that evening I had Evolution of Martyrdom with Dr. Shmuel Shepkaru, an Israeli with a really cool accent. He was pretty Socratic, which was really refreshing, since most professors I've run across have been all about class discussion or plain old lecture. The subject matter seems pretty interesting, tracing martyrdom in Judaism, Christianity, and Western culture in general as a concept, and looking at particular defining events and martyrs. Sadly, I'm probably going to drop this class, since the timing is difficult, and I don't want to take 18 hours. This semester's going to be hard enough as it is. This is all assuming that...

...I can get into Spanish Reading & Lit., with which I started this morning. I'm not enrolled for real, but there were about five people who were that didn't show up this morning. Unfortunately, there were about five people who weren't enrolled trying to get in, so we'll see. Basically, it's a reading/writing heavy Spanish class, except more on the reading this time.

After Spanish, I had History of the American Southwest, which, from the reading list, looked like it was going to be all about the opression of Indians. After the first lecture, it appears that this won't be the case. The workload, though, is going to be quite big, lots of reading, and more writing assignments than I'm used to for a comparable course. The professor seems pretty enjoyable though, so we'll see.

After that, I immediately went to go sign up for an audition time in concert band. I haven't practiced at all, but I'll look over it later. Besides, I don't really care all that much what part they put me on.

Finally, I had my Honors colloquium, which has some long main title, but the subtitle is the one that makes sense: The Other in Science Fiction Film and Lit. When I walked in, I immediately felt like nerdiness count of the environment had gone up by about %50. I'm not sure why that surprised me; it's an honors class about Sci-Fi, for crying out loud. If there will be a straw that breaks my proverbial camel's back this go-round, this will be it. There's about 300 pages of reading per week, a film screening every other week, 31-55 pages of writing, an oral presentation, and a final creative project. Whew! The good news is, if I survive it, the actual material and class discussion should be a lot of fun.

...So it looks to be a pretty interesting semester. I might have to take up residence at the library to get enough of the work done, but that's a bridge I'll cross on arrival.

Bill Wallace?

If you grew up in Oklahoma like so many of us did, you were undoubtedly exposed to Bill Wallace at some point. He is (was?) a children's author from Chickasha, and wrote many of my favorite books back in elementary school... A Dog Called Kitty, The Biggest Klutz in Fifth Grade, and who could forget Danger on Panther Peak? But anyway, the whole purpose of this post is to find out if anybody knows if he's still alive. This whole curiosity began when I was doing random searches on Wikipedia, and the search for Bill Wallace brought me to the bass player from some band. I began to think about writing an article about him, since he was my favorite author as a kid, and thought that knowing whether or not he's alive would be a good thing. While the internet seems to make no mention of his death, so far as I can tell, he hasn't published anything since 2001, and I can't seem to find any current biography info. If anybody knows the scoop on this, and would fill me in, I'd really appreciate it.

I hear things....

It'd be easier to hang out. That wouldn't be very nice. Fennagle. You don't have to be in Oklahoma to take online classes. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!! Sheee-it. We need a hot tub. I think my poo will help me. Ding! Damned subliminal advertising....SMOKE. Imagine me...President. Did you get less ugly? This is where you're going to put your mistakes. I think I've seen this movie 100 times before. I'm suing, I'm suing, I'm on it, I'm on it! That doesn't make any sense! Jose Andrade. Put us together, and we're 34. Fuckin' Democrats. It's Poptarts! Knowledge Brings Fear. Ahhh, stuff. Raaaaawwtrrr! If it gets in there, it could be smoldering for weeks, but once it ignites, it ignites, and it ignites hot! The court will cut back on Roe v. Wade. Luminaries. I hate brain cancer, when bug spray kills my sperm. The suspect is not your typical car-jacker. We have the best prices, available in two colors of leather. The cow says "Mooooooo!" I'll break your logic.

Nobody's Postin'....

...so I'm postin'. That's right. That's what this is, you lousy wankers, a post...a mighty fine post if I do say so myself.